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Ryan Adams, abuse, the Stans, and people who believe no apology is good enough


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Old 02-20-2019, 08:27 PM   #1701
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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I love all the psychobabble and arm chair diagnosis... however, did anyone ever considered that Ryan is and always has been a spoiled rotten, entitled little brat?


Yes we’ve all attempted to psychoanalyse the situation but spoilt and entitled doesn’t fit his upbringing. But yeah but maybe success brought some of that.


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Old 02-20-2019, 08:28 PM   #1702
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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Sweet response
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:28 PM   #1703
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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Do you know that to be true?


I believe her.
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:29 PM   #1704
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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Do you know that to be true?
She said it happened. Would she lie about that happening?
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:29 PM   #1705
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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I believe her.
If that is true then he was abusive to her
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:30 PM   #1706
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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If that is true then he was abusive to her


There’s some progress...
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:30 PM   #1707
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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Yes we’ve all attempted to psychoanalyse the situation but spoilt and entitled doesn’t fit his upbringing. But yeah but maybe success brought some of that.


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au contraire. He had a fine upbringing.
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:32 PM   #1708
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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There’s some progress...
However to PB and Mandy Moore I don’t think its that cut and dry. I think there is a lot to this story that has yet to be heard.
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:36 PM   #1709
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

Two ideas that will not be at peace in the same mind, creating an unease, a tension:

1) Ryan Adams has been accused, in a way that hangs together revealing a consistent pattern, of behaving in a way towards women, including one underage, that I find, at the least, unpleasant.

Further, others may hold stronger views than I do about it, which I worry might be right.

This makes it difficult, to some degree, to listen to his music.

2) I like listening to Ryan Adams' music. Really like it. A lot.


The issue then for all of us is how to resolve the tension.

Some have done it by washing their hands of him. To diminish 2. Let the fallout from 1 be what it is, and deal with the loss of a favourite artist.

Others are trying to diminish 1. Downplay Ryan's behaviour ('a bad relationship', 'not illegal', 'oh come on, it's Ryan! Of course he's like that'). Build up the role and responsiblity of those towards whom he was abusive ('they knew what he was like', 'they were getting something out of it', 'they were using him'). Until, really, whatever is all this fuss about?

There is some hope that one would only attempt to diminish 1 where one recognised something that, to carry on as desired in listening to Ryan, would need to be diminished.
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:38 PM   #1710
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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"So it's your fault for not anticipating being abused." Fuck you.
if you have one inkling of the possibility of it happening? than yes.
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:40 PM   #1711
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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She said it happened. Would she lie about that happening?
why do we put so much stock in someones word? i'm not say she's lying but people say shit. i saw the lockness monster. does that make it true?
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:43 PM   #1712
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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their continual relationship with the monster ryan adams. fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me.
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:43 PM   #1713
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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why do we put so much stock in someones word? i'm not say she's lying but people say shit. i saw the lockness monster. does that make it true?


The metoo movement has made people afraid to think for themselves
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:45 PM   #1714
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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The metoo movement has made people afraid to think for themselves
So a dozen women randomly decided to tell similar stories? For what?
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:47 PM   #1715
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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So a dozen women randomly decided to tell similar stories? For what?
They’re not all similar
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:51 PM   #1716
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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RA is too much of a coward to kill himself
I'm not sure how you can say this. Or why you'd even want to go there. He clearly has some serious mental health issues coupled with multiple addictions. He has demonstrated a lot of destructive behavior. I'm pissed off at him and disturbed by these allegations, but suicide is no joke. I hope he doesn't ever do that - and it's something I've long wondered about Ryan.

I work with adult students (some are older than me) and quite a few have mental health issues and/or serious substance abuse. One of my best friends is a heroin addict. When she is clean she's an angel, when she's using you wouldn't recognize her. It's complicated, messy stuff.

I'm not justifying any of the behavior he has done but I think that's a fucked up thing to say - especially about someone none of us know. I sure hope he doesn't ever try to commit suicide and I'm on the side of wanting to see him fix this. He's in his mid 40's. If he can get his shit together he has 30+ years to be a positive man and do a lot of good in the world. I'm not holding my breath, but I hope he can do that. And I guess I'm pulling for him to do that.
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:53 PM   #1717
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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you've never been in a relationship that was a little toxic? you've never put up with abuse and bullshit because you were trying to manipulate the relationship in your favor? you've never fucked someone over? you've never lied to get your way?, i could go on. you must be a bore to be around
You can defend him being an asshole all you like but he flashed his cock at a 14 year old girl. The end.
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:54 PM   #1718
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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So a dozen women randomly decided to tell similar stories? For what?
why don't these dozen women say what their intentions were when they started their relationships with mr adams?
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:56 PM   #1719
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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You can defend him being an asshole all you like but he flashed his cock at a 14 year old girl. The end.
has that been proven?
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:56 PM   #1720
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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why don't these dozen women say what their intentions were when they started their relationships with mr adams?


The 14 year old was excited to talk music with a famous musician.
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:56 PM   #1721
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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has that been proven?


Yes
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:58 PM   #1722
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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Yes
really? if so i have not seen it
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Old 02-20-2019, 08:59 PM   #1723
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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really? if so i have not seen it
Sorry, I don't think the screen caps are out there.
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Old 02-20-2019, 09:00 PM   #1724
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

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The 14 year old was excited to talk music with a famous musician.
sorry i should've have been a little more specific. the women of age.
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Old 02-20-2019, 09:00 PM   #1725
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Re: Your favorite singer/songwriter is a Perv: The Thread

NYT confirmed it
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